R56 What does the Sport button REALLY do?
6th Gear
Joined: Mar 2007
Posts: 2,009
Likes: 0
From: home
The button blows the candle out.
With the sport button on, the steering and the gas pedal feel as if they are in a mass of cotton submerged in liquid wax. However, when I press the button, they firm up as if they are in solid wax. When I turn it off, they go soggy again. That's because when the candle is on the wax melts and when the candle is off the wax solidifies and makes things firm.
With the sport button on, the steering and the gas pedal feel as if they are in a mass of cotton submerged in liquid wax. However, when I press the button, they firm up as if they are in solid wax. When I turn it off, they go soggy again. That's because when the candle is on the wax melts and when the candle is off the wax solidifies and makes things firm.
Last edited by r56mini; Aug 22, 2007 at 08:06 AM.
6th Gear
Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 15,966
Likes: 1
Sure you aren't pushing the round button near the winshield. Well, at least you aren't pulling it out...
5th Gear
Joined: May 2007
Posts: 630
Likes: 0
From: Midwest
nor do I know from personal experience HOWEVER I sell an awful lot of it (pharmacist)...
6th Gear
Joined: Jan 2007
Posts: 1,479
Likes: 1
From: South Florida.
As a MC automatic trans owner I disagree with you. It puts my throttle in a whole different mode My RPMs are higher, my gear ghanges are completely different, makes for a completely different different ride.
1st Gear
Joined: Jul 2007
Posts: 45
Likes: 0
Well, that's an easy one... It illuminates a diode at the ultra secret British Leyland department in headquarters at BMW. There, elderly english men in string back driving gloves assess your current driving situation, via pinhole cameras in the hood scoop, and adjust a choke pull, while a team of skilled technicians with rubber mallets pound on SU (dashpot) carburetors (outsourcing the carburetor pounding is also the key to the mini's reliability).
Once you turn sport mode off, the diode extinguishes and the elderly gentlemen drink tea while the mallet technicians play cricket. Between overs, they take turns with the mallets just in case it's needed.
The sport button being off by default is in their contract... otherwise they might not ever get to play cricket.
Once you turn sport mode off, the diode extinguishes and the elderly gentlemen drink tea while the mallet technicians play cricket. Between overs, they take turns with the mallets just in case it's needed.
The sport button being off by default is in their contract... otherwise they might not ever get to play cricket.
OVERDRIVE
Joined: Aug 2006
Posts: 12,326
Likes: 6
From: PA
WHAT ?!
All of you should be ashamed ! You have a Sport Mode Button in your MINI and you don't even know what it's used for ?!?! You're all an embarassment to MINI owners all over the world. You should immediately turn in your keys and be given a Kia Rio to drive for the next 10 years !! 
The Sport Mode Button is a button that, when depressed once, provides a Heads-Up Display on the windshield that shows the 6th game of the 1975 World Series.
Depress it twice, and it displays Super Bowl XXIII.
Depress it three times, and you get the Ali vs Frazier boxing match from 1971.
Geez, what else would a Sport Mode Button do ??!! :impatient
The Sport Mode Button is a button that, when depressed once, provides a Heads-Up Display on the windshield that shows the 6th game of the 1975 World Series.
Depress it twice, and it displays Super Bowl XXIII.
Depress it three times, and you get the Ali vs Frazier boxing match from 1971.
Geez, what else would a Sport Mode Button do ??!! :impatient
it pops little stability wings out the side, pops up a spoiler with LEDs in the back, starts an LED show on the front and takes over the driving while you sleep on the long interstate that you don't want to drive on anyway. Then wakes you with a deep but soothing electronic voice, just in time to be ticketed because you failed to wake for the twisty's
6th Gear
Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 1,310
Likes: 1
From: Ay Bee Cue, NM
LMAO!!!
Last I checked, the sport button in my MCS made the gremlins under the bonnet work some voodoo and try to rip the steering wheel out of my hands!
Last I checked, the sport button in my MCS made the gremlins under the bonnet work some voodoo and try to rip the steering wheel out of my hands!
Thread Starter
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3rd Gear
Joined: Aug 2007
Posts: 217
Likes: 0
From: Albuquerque, NM
Turns off the sport button in the nearest R56, causing that driver to exclaim "$%&#!?? What happened?". A furious button-pushing battle ensues until they are out of range from one another.
5th Gear
Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 895
Likes: 2
From: Canton, GA
It illuminates a diode at the ultra secret British Leyland department in headquarters at BMW. There, elderly english men in string back driving gloves assess your current driving situation, via pinhole cameras in the hood scoop, and adjust a choke pull, while a team of skilled technicians with rubber mallets pound on SU (dashpot) carburetors (outsourcing the carburetor pounding is also the key to the mini's reliability).
Once you turn sport mode off, the diode extinguishes and the elderly gentlemen drink tea while the mallet technicians play cricket. Between overs, they take turns with the mallets just in case it's needed.
The sport button being off by default is in their contract... otherwise they might not ever get to play cricket.
Once you turn sport mode off, the diode extinguishes and the elderly gentlemen drink tea while the mallet technicians play cricket. Between overs, they take turns with the mallets just in case it's needed.
The sport button being off by default is in their contract... otherwise they might not ever get to play cricket.
I'm hungry for haggis now and I don't know why....
