Hilarious Post. This isn't mine, but was written by VegasDriver on mazdaforum.com. Thought I'd share

A few generalizations from different car forums:

Bentley Forums
- I used the ash tray today. How do I replace it?

Camaro/Firebird Forums
- My girl slept with my brother and my wife. How can I kill 'em? btw,
I have a record and I ain't going back.

Mustang forums
-Some punk kid in a Civic tried to race me.

Monte Carlo forums
-Why do I keep getting pulled over, it ain't stolen yo.

Civic forums
-Some punk kid in a Mustang tried to race me.

VW Bug forum
- The Save the Earth concert was a success (pics)

Yugo Forum
- When's the last time yours ran?

Lamborghini forum
- Wind noise around 210MPH

Miata forums
- Some redneck jackass in a Chevy Tahoe just ran over my car (pics)

Chevy Tahoe forum
-Miata stuck in my undercarriage. How do I safely remove it? (pics)

Pontiac Fiero forum
- Just bought a new flame retardant suit (pics)

BMW 7-series forum
- Where to get service on my Rolex?

Cadillac forum
- Problems parallel parking at bingo.

Chevy Suburban Forum
- Is the price of gas going down anytime soon?

Buick Forum
- Is Medicare or Medicaid right for me?

Delorean forum
- Just got back from the future and blew a head gasket. Please help. I'm
from 1985.

Crown Victoria forum
- How come people never pass me on the highway?

Honda Accord forum
- Mom is giving me the car. Looking for some cheap, used 18 inch rims.

Toyota Echo forum
- Do our cars use AAA or AA's?

Ferrari forums
- Need suggestions about a business trip to Colombia. Want to get in
and out fast.

Porsche forums
- Tire just went flat. Is it best to trade or sell the car myself?

Saturn forums
- Roman candle landed on my fender. Melted and need to replace.

Jaguar forum
- Is the carbon fiber dash kit group-buy still on?

Mercedes forum
- My wife and her stink hole lawyer are trying to ruin me in divorce
court. How do I get them both killed and not get in trouble with my medical
board?

Mini forum
- Just flipped the Cooper after seeing The Italian Job. Suing the movie
company. (pics)

Dodge Viper forum
- I frightened myself on the way home from work yesterday. How to get pee
stains out of the leather?

McLaren F1 forum
-Some punk kid in a F16 tried to race me.

Dodge Minivan forum
- Where's the best place to post the soccer schedule so I don't forget
where I'm supposed to be?

Hummer forum
- Had a fender bender today. 24 hurt, 10 killed. Do I have to get the
black touch-up paint from the dealer? He's 25 miles away. That's $35
in gas.

Fiat forum
-Hello? Am I the only member?

Subaru WRX forum
- I hate cops. Got ticketed for drifting in the Walmart parking lot.

Chevy pickup forum
- How do I git the dried tobacco juice stains off the side of mah
truck?

Vette Forums
-Why did I pay $50k for something with a Cavalier steering wheel?

Ford 2.3 forums
-Help! Replaced everything, still doesn't start

SRTforums
- SRT's are the gods of the street, why do people still laugh at us? They're not neons!!

Audi A4 2.8 V6 Forum:
- So..... yah...... we're ALL getting like 18-22mpg still..... right guys? Okay, yup.... just checkin!

VW GTI forum:
- #$&^%* its not a golf!

Cavalier forums:
- cut my springs and added 16 inch rims (pics)

Sunfire forums:
- cavalier are so ghey, they are pieces of crap (pics)

MR2 forums:
- guy told me my ferrari looked like crap (pics)

AE86 forums:
- got a ticket for drifting how to fight it?

Spyder Forums:
- does my hair move in the wind to much? (pics)

DSM forums:
- got a 12.9 right before it broke!

G35 forums:
- raced a Mclaren last night and beat him , foreals!

350Z forums:
- some douche in a g35 tried to race me

Skyline forums:
- got my new skyline, drives like my old maxima!(pics)

3000gt forums:
- need help on how to change tire, car to heavy for floor jack

Jeep forums:
- rolled trying to flex new suspension (pics)

Hyundai forum:
- some butthole in a jeep rolled over ontop of my car (pics)

Supra forums:
- broke the land speed record in my town! (pics)

Suzuki forums:
- I thought we only had two wheels

Streetbike forums:
- wind noise at 200mph, how to keep it quiet?

stuntbike forums:
- ran from the ghettobird, flipped off cop (pics)

Seat forums:
- que?

M3 forums:
- a gay guy hit on me, should i punch him or invite him over?

Mercedes forums:
- help with armrest refrigerator.. not cooling enough!

Austin Martin forums:
- why the f^&* is my three hundred thousand dollar ar have Ford escort door handles! suing!

 

Oh, that's good!

 

That is good.

 

Epic lol

 

So true!

 

Ahahahahah ohhhh god brings back memories or my Merkur.

 

I am still laughing, +1 to this post!

 

Ill add the lotus elise forums: tried to drift it today, but the car just keeps making the turn

 

that is funny

 

Hehehe I don't make the stereotypes, I only see them....

 

A former co-worker of mine is an old Brit-car lover from way back. (In part because he's an old Brit from way back!) He had learned to put a car into a four-wheel drift in something pedestrian like an Austin Seven. Then he and a friend built an Elan (some were sold as "kits" to avoid heavy taxation), and he tried the same thing on the same road at the same speed.

"Nearly killed meself!" was how he put it. The car didn't drift, it just turned where he pointed the wheel! He said it took a whole lot more work and speed to get it into a drift...

 

An entertaining read!

 

As a guy that used to own a GTI I can totally attest to the "VW is the bestest BS". That and "if I chip the car I can totally pwn every single car out there." In the past few years they've turned into a huge douche bag hipster crowd...

 

Dodge Cummins Forum

- Yo how do you install that switch to just roll coal out my stacks.

 

If it dont smoke black... Take it back.

 

Great post, thanks for sharing!!

 

Was just trolling an STI forum and found a post that was pretty funny. It was a post comparing the GTI/GLI vs. MCS.

It read: "Personally, my own opinion. If you drive a MINI cooper, you tend to have a MINI ****. VW is for women, and the GTI is a sorry excuse for a car. Hatchbacks suck ***. Let him drive your STi, maybe he will see some sense."

And he thinks WE are compensating for something?? Yikes... I hope I see this guy on the road sometime to take him through some twisties.

 

Yes sir I have a tiny ****, that is why I drive a MINI. That makes about as much sense has I have blonde hair so I wear red.