Have a original Mini or old British car?

I found the following for sale on Ebay:

[Quote Have you inadvertently let the smoke out of the wires on your classic British car? This, then, is the solution to your problem!

Here is presented for your perusal one Lucas Replacement Wiring Harness Smoke kit, P/N 530433, along with the very rare Churchill Tool 18G548BS adapter tube and metering valve.

These kits were supplied surreptitiously to Lucas factory technicians as a trouble-shooting and repair aid for the rectification of chronic electrical problems on a plethora of British cars.

The smoke is metered through the fuse box, into the circuit which has released it's original smoke until the leak is located and repaired. The affected circuit is then rectified and the replacement smoke re-introduced. An advantage over the cheap repro smoke kits currently available is the exceptionally rare Churchill metering valve and fuse box adapter. It enables the intrepid and highly skilled British Car Technician to meter the precise amount of genuine Lucas smoke required by the circuit.

Unlike the cheap, far eastern replacement DIY smoke offered by the usual suppliers, this kit includes a filter to ensure that all the smoke is of consistent size.

It has been our experience in our shop that the reproduction Taiwanese smoke is often “lumpy”, which will cause excessive resistance in our finely engineered British harnesses and components. This is often the cause of failure in the repro electrical parts currently available, causing much consternation and misplaced cursing of the big three suppliers.

These kits have long been the secret weapon of the in the trade, and this may be the last one available. Be fore warned, though, that it is not applicable to any British vehicle built after the discontinuing of bullet connectors, so you Range Rover types are still on your own...This genuine Factory Authorized kit contains enough smoke to recharge the entire window circuit on a 420 Jaguar, and my dear friend and advisor George Wolf of British Auto Specialty assures me that he can replace ALL the smoke in a W&F Barrett All-Weather Invalid Car (147cc) with enough left over to test a whole box of Wind-Tone horns for escaped smoke.

How much more endorsement do you need?

More you say?

Well, I once let the smoke out of the overdrive wiring on my friend Roger Hankey's TR3B, and was able to drive over 200 miles home from the Roadster Factory Summer Party by carefully introducing smoke into the failed circuit WITHOUT even properly repairing the leak!

Another friend was able to repair the cooling fan circuit of his Series 1 E-type by merely replacing a fuse and injecting a small quantity of smoke back into the wires.

So there! So, if you're troubled by lost smoke, bid early and often! Thanks for looking!







Many years ago a co-worker told me that everything I had learned about how electric powered things worked was wrong.
He told me that it wasn't electrons that made it all work but it was smoke.
To prove the point just let the smoke out and see how well it works when the smoke clears.

Cheers,
Jack

 

if electricty is based on electrons, is morality based on morons?