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I posted this over on the Single Support Thread but have only gotten a few to reply so here goes!:
Well as of today I never really thought I would have to do this , BUT once again I am wrong. Well the... great person that I was with for like two monthes dumped me today, and yes I am fine as a male saying that I did get dumped... As it turned out we really weren't meant for each other, her mind was on someone else, and hey what do ya know mine IS too! Well it sucks but I'm glad that I have some freedom for a tad bit. Hopefully not for long though. It's kinda funny I have had only one serious relationship (that was this one) since I started HS. I am almost a senior now, and unlike before the ladies are starting to get destracting. I'm sure they feel the same of me though! Most guys of my age are wanting the easiest girl out there... that doesn't describe me. The reason this last one fell apart, was we just lost interest in each other.
Ah yes but there are others! The problem I am currently having is with this one blonde (who is actually pretty smart... lol), in my U.S. History class. Like I said before though I'm really just looking for someone with a great personality, someone who is not only not full of themselves (common with girls @ my school ), but knows where they're headed in life, espcially since we only have like 16 monthes 'til our butts are in college. It just so happens that this girl is HOT which is a big plus. It is very rare for me to find someone I'm both physically and mentally atttracted to. Also through a little chat session I found out that she is planning on going to the same college as I am. So I'm like, and yes this has been going on for a while, my X just didn't know about it. The only problem I am having is while I want this girl SOOOO bad, I just fear if it does turn out that things will be different. As in we are like really good friends now, and I just don't want it to feel akward, but I want to show her I care about her and want to be more than "just friends". I also have a problem with competition. They I KNOW just want her. It's not for her personality either. The thing I have going for me however, is that she doesn't like immature guys, thus she generally goes for older ones. While I am a couple of monthes younger than her, I believe I have alot more maturity, than most other guys in my grade. I want to make her laugh and enjoy her time with me, then I will make my move, which I already have sort have thought about. I just want to get this girl, and keep her for a long time.
Does anyone have any tips that could help me?
Mike
__________________ 2005 MCS, Chili Red/White/Black M7 16%-2%, M7 OCC, double ceramic DFIC, M7 DDM, DT BPV, IK22s, Nologys, RMW Exhaust, JCW Sport Suspension & BBK, HSport Comp Rear Sway, VIP Engine Damper, and lots more 2011 BMW M3 Custom-Order DCT Sedan, Mineral White/Black Loaded, 20" Matte Black ADV.1 10.1s, Active Autowerke Signature Exhaust, Matte Black IND Cosmetic Kit, Macht Schnell Stage 2 Intake, Mineral White Brembos
Best advice I can offer is to not let girls make you go nuts.
__________________ Disclaimer: No claim is made that the quality of the MINI-related advice offered by Yucca Patrol
is greater than the quality of MINI-related advice offered by other NAM members.
1. At all times just be yourself. If she is attracted to then great. If not, see # 2 below.
2. Don't put too much weight or stress on yoursellf about this girl. You are young and there is lots of time. If it doesn't turn out to be then oh well - it just wasn't meant to be. You don't need to find your life's mate now. Odds are much better in College.
3. If you do get together with this girl I guarantee things will change. It alwasy does - that's not a bad thing its just part of the process and the true test is when couples survive the changes. If you don't survive the changes, you will learn from the experience. Again its part of the process.
4. Not to be condescending, but you are still an infant in the relationship game. No one here or anywhere has this thing totally figured out but you certainly will know much more in 5 or 10 years. Cool down and just have fun.
I guess what I am trying to say is that things move so fast at your age that you might as well just go ahead and ask her out and get it over with. She says yes, then great! She says no, then you can find the next girl you like.
Chances are that even a "long term" 16 month relationship before high school graduation will end before then and if it doesn't, it will almost certainly end when you both go to college even if you go to the same school. I don't mean this in a negative way, but just to remind you to look around and see how often and quickly high school students dump each other and get new boy and girl friends. It's just not worth getting all worked up about, it is just part of being your age and so you should just have fun with it all.
So what I am getting at is just don't let it consume you at your age.. Go ahead and "make your move" and see what happens. Have fun! If it doesn't work out then find another cute girl that is absolutely perfect for you and see what happens with her!
__________________ Disclaimer: No claim is made that the quality of the MINI-related advice offered by Yucca Patrol
is greater than the quality of MINI-related advice offered by other NAM members.
I guess what I am trying to say is that things move so fast at your age that you might as well just go ahead and ask her out and get it over with. She says yes, then great! She says no, then you can find the next girl you like.
Chances are that even a "long term" 16 month relationship before high school graduation will end before then and if it doesn't, it will almost certainly end when you both go to college even if you go to the same school. I don't mean this in a negative way, but just to remind you to look around and see how often and quickly high school students dump each other and get new boy and girl friends. It's just not worth getting all worked up about, it is just part of being your age and so you should just have fun with it all.
So what I am getting at is just don't let it consume you at your age.. Go ahead and "make your move" and see what happens. Have fun! If it doesn't work out then find another cute girl that is absolutely perfect for you and see what happens with her!
Sorry to burst your bubble, Yucca, but if I had read this when I was in high school, I would have :impatient :impatient :impatient :impatient :impatient :impatient :impatient ! We are getting old............
Sorry to burst your bubble, Yucca, but if I had read this when I was in high school, I would have :impatient :impatient :impatient :impatient :impatient :impatient :impatient ! We are getting old............
I've spent every school day this fall teaching high school students. . . I don't expect them to listen to the voice of reason.
__________________ Disclaimer: No claim is made that the quality of the MINI-related advice offered by Yucca Patrol
is greater than the quality of MINI-related advice offered by other NAM members.
sounds like you're still in HS (I've been out for sometime now )... if you get a gf, great . Even better if you have a date for prom (gf or otherwise). Play the field if that's your personality . If you go to college, you'll have more opps to do the gf thing (I met my wife in college)
I say enjoy HS while you can. You've got a cool car and time.. what more do you need now anyways
__________________
'05 MCc - BRG/G - LUCK 729 / MMC #255 - Flickr Chicago MINI Motoring Club - Club Officer / C.O.R.N.; High Plains Motoring Society; STL MINIs
Don't listen to these old coots! I feel your issues and I think you should see if she wants to go to a movie or go out for lunch or dinner. Try to get a plan where you are doing something, in case you're not sure what to chat about. Then when you are with her, you'll know if there is any chemistry.
PM me if you'd like more details. I remember being your age and I know how intense it feels. It is a wonderful part of your life and you'll always look back on it fondly!
1. At all times just be yourself. If she is attracted to then great. If not, see # 2 below.
2. Don't put too much weight or stress on yoursellf about this girl. You are young and there is lots of time. If it doesn't turn out to be then oh well - it just wasn't meant to be. You don't need to find your life's mate now. Odds are much better in College.
3. If you do get together with this girl I guarantee things will change. It alwasy does - that's not a bad thing its just part of the process and the true test is when couples survive the changes. If you don't survive the changes, you will learn from the experience. Again its part of the process.
4. Not to be condescending, but you are still an infant in the relationship game. No one here or anywhere has this thing totally figured out but you
certainly will know much more in 5 or 10 years. Cool down and just have fun.
Listen to this man! He knows what he is talking about, I am a living testament to everything he just posted! I was in a long term relationship throughout my senior year and 2 weeks before i went to college it ended bitterly. Now I am a freshman in college and I have been on more dates in a semester than i have ever been on in my whole life! When you get to college here is something to remember, take a girl out to lunch or dinner some place off campus! They will enjoy it because it because everyone needs food from someplace other than the cafeteria! Like others have said dont get to worked up about not being in a relationship now, be more concerned with finishing your highschool career strong. Women will always be here and there will always be the special someone out there waiting to be discovered!
OH how I miss being an undergrad... Screw Christmas.. September is the most wonderful time of the year.. NEW FRESHMEN>. women who worked off the freshy 15... ITS just wonderful.. soo jealous.. so jealous.. Mikey no worries mate.. go for it.. worst thing she can say is No.. and thats not all that bad when you consider all the other things that other people could say no to. As for H.S. students being irrational... well that maybe true but hey adults are too a lot of the time.. and love/lust is the best thing to be irrational about.. just remember to wear a hat mikey.. hope they told you about that in school.. aside from that.. really you only have a few more months until college..
Quote:
Originally Posted by mybroscoop
Listen to this man! He knows what he is talking about, I am a living testament to everything he just posted! I was in a long term relationship throughout my senior year and 2 weeks before i went to college it ended bitterly. Now I am a freshman in college and I have been on more dates in a semester than i have ever been on in my whole life! When you get to college here is something to remember, take a girl out to lunch or dinner some place off campus! They will enjoy it because it because everyone needs food from someplace other than the cafeteria! Like others have said dont get to worked up about not being in a relationship now, be more concerned with finishing your highschool career strong. Women will always be here and there will always be the special someone out there waiting to be discovered!
__________________
09 MCSa
Nothing yet! saving the bills for some choice upgrades!
I've got a masochistic idea for you.. go get a PhD in something.. best torture for your money you will ever spend..
I agree with what everyone has said so far about not counting on a relationship lasting through college, but I do have one thing to add. You said that you were afraid of damaging your friendship with her. I personally never dated someone that I wasn't friends with (at least for a little while) prior to dating them. If you can't be friends with someone without a romantic portion, then how do you expect to have any sort of long term relationship? If the friendship is no more after a break-up, then how strong of a friendship was it? I married my best friend from college and I couldn't imagine being with anyone else
I remember being your age and I know how intense it feels. It is a wonderful part of your life and you'll always look back on it fondly!
. . . .or you could be like some of us and look back at high school as the very worst and most depressing time of your life and be thankful just that it is over and you never have to relive that nightmare again. .. .
So just have fun and don't get too worked up about it all!
__________________ Disclaimer: No claim is made that the quality of the MINI-related advice offered by Yucca Patrol
is greater than the quality of MINI-related advice offered by other NAM members.
Geez... I wish somebody had told me this in college!
I'm 35 and still looking... though I might agree the odds were better in college!
I did also say that no one here or anywhere has it all figured out. That definitely includes me. The best I can offer a young person like the thread starter here is what I have learned from my mistakes. And there have been a lot of mistakes.
Lets see...she prefers older guys. She's going to college where there are thousands of older guys. I predict that you two will be dating, she'll start hanging out with some artsy, philosophy dude, you'll get jealous, she won't understand, and the relationship will implode. But hey, I've been known to be wrong once or twi...well once.
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), in my U.S. History class. Like I said before though I'm really just looking for someone with a great personality, someone who is not only not full of themselves (common with girls @ my school 
), but knows where they're headed in life, espcially since we only have like 16 monthes 'til our butts are in college. It just so happens that this girl is HOT which is a big plus. It is very rare for me to find someone I'm both physically and mentally atttracted to. Also through a little chat session I found out that she is planning on going to the same college as I am. So I'm like
